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"She looks like fun," I think, and so I press my thumb onto the screen and swipe her to the right, a gesture that passes for flirtation here in the peculiar world of Tinder, the mobile app responsible for "introducing" us.
With that, the word liked flares up in green, a virtual stamp denoting my interest, and Michelle vanishes into the digitized ether as quickly as she first appeared. I contemplate this for about a second, then forget Michelle entirely, distracted now by Christine, the 36-year-old in a sequined evening gown who has taken Michelle's place. Certainly more age-appropriate, but she is 28 miles away and, more to the point, doesn't inspire the sort of fun thoughts Michelle did.
It looks at how your teenager is likely to react, and what you need to say and do, how to discover what else they’ve stolen, and what to do if you find they’ve been shoplifting.
This is a conversation they’ll look back on in future years – the day they got caught.
To encourage a sense of contribution in the home agree with your child which jobs they will do ‘for love’ and jobs where they can earn for what they want. Encourage outside activities especially D of E, volunteering, scouts, sports or music – something good for their self esteem 32. Help each of your children feel loved, important and accepted in the home. This booklet contains a script you can use to confront your teenager about stealing.
Be accepting of any friends you child wants to bring home, but insist that you are around when they have their friends round and engage with them. Make a point of being honest when someone gives you the wrong change for instance or by handing in any money or objects you find. Don’t leave money around or make it easy for a teen to have access to valuables / your things. Could they have pocket money (maybe linked to responsibilities in the home) or an allowance to pay for all their own essentials such as toiletries, clothing, travel and social events? Regularly bring up and discuss stories you have heard from the news or TV programmes where stealing has been an issue. It lists the difficulties of letting a child off too lightly and the dangers of being too severe.
Make sure your child takes responsibility for their behaviour when in your home. Explain that they can talk with you about what is going on and establish a way to make it safe – (where you won’t lose your temper), having a code word for when they need to have an important conversation with you sometimes helps. Keep a proper account of your money, and keep it hidden. And how to work out exactly what to do so your teenager makes proper amends for the theft.
But let them know that you do not expect them to steal again and that you trust that they will remember their values. If you are not sure who has stolen it offer a way to return money – Put an envelope on the table or on your bed and go out for a fixed length of time.
Explain that if the money is not in there by the time you return you will call the police. If the money is returned explain that next time money or valuables go missing you will call the police straight away 26. If other children’s possessions or money is also going missing consider putting locks on the children’s doors and your bedroom door or provide a locked space for their valuables in their rooms.